I recently invented a new product, though it’s still in the prototype stage. It combines a metal detector with a weed whipper. I figured, this way I can keep my lawn looking good and make some money on the side!
Didn’t think it was funny? Well, you’re not alone. I’ve been telling this joke – an original – since the mid 1990’s, with only a lukewarm response. Nevertheless, I continue to chuckle!
It had been a while since I played basketball, and I’d been thinking of it lately. My under-inflated ball was stored inside of a box in the garage, not far from an air pump. Shorts, t-shirt, shoes, air in the ball – I was ready.
The basketball hoop where I used to shoot wasn’t far, and so I practiced dribbling along the way. When I arrived, I took a moment to review the situation, and then remembered that I had a good book at home which I was planning to read.
For many years, a seagull has called the top perch of this local street light his own. Last winter, however, a marauding crow sought to intervene, and, by virtue of its very annoying screech, drive the seagull from the pole position…
Let the games begin!
Footnote: the seagull persevered.
I once lived in Holland, Michigan, where, one summer’s day, a friend – Brooks Besjovec – asked if I’d like to see some…
Red Chinese Bats?
It wasn’t far, he said, located just off of Ottawa Beach Road along the north shore of Lake Macatawa, so I skeptically agreed and the journey ensued.
It was late afternoon when we arrived. We parked along the side of a road near a local wind-surfing shop which I was familiar with, and my friend pointed across the yard of a nearby house. There, roughly four feet off of the ground, I could see a large rectangular-shaped wooden box between two trees.
As we approached, Brooks cautioned me not to startle the bats, to approach the cage slowly, quietly. In so doing, I could see that the top of the cage was open, covered only with chicken wire.
A painted sign attached to the cage read, “Chinese Bats”, and, as I peered inside, I could see that my friend had indeed been telling the truth; there before my eyes were two red plastic Wiffle Bats – a.k.a., toy baseball bats (Made In China).
According to this rooster, it’s time to wake up. Better do so now, so as not to get on the wrong side of this ornery, rather disruptive character! Haha. Now that you’re wide awake, why not visit my gallery at Redbubble to discover some fun gift and apparel items featuring this comical design. I’ll put on some coffee…see you soon!
Keep warm this winter inside your home, while at the same time enjoying the winter snow in a picture from my gallery at Fine Art America! This shot was taken in near zero-degree weather after an hour behind a team of dogs on a sled through the arctic wilderness…well, no. Actually, I stepped out on the balcony, took this picture and dashed back inside! You may enjoy a variety of print types – framed, canvas, metal, acrylic, art and wood. Thanks for stopping by.
While waiting in line today at the grocery store, the notion that January is just around the corner crossed my mind. I questioned whether or not I would make a resolution for the coming year, and, if so, would I fully commit to following through on that decision?
It seems that, each year, many people experience disappointment in failing to uphold their stated goals. I, too, of course, have shared such moments, though hope that the coming year may be different.
After some thought, I came to a conclusion: starting in 2018, I resolve to give up lettuce.